POWER BLOG

I am amazed at the letters that I (and my wife) receive from women who what to know what their role is as a pastors wife. They really don't know, and how could they? There is nothing in the bible that relates to the role of the pastors wife in the church.

However, there are a whole plethora of man made rules. Like so many other things, we take it upon ourselves to transform these man made rules (that we invented) into the "Word of God - Written in Stone".

I have heard horror stories from pastors wives. Some of them are not only expected to take care of their home and family, but everyone else's as well. These poor women are being run ragged! They are expected to surrender their privacy for anyone who needs to use their house or even kitchen.

Suddenly, if there is a Church function that requires 50 pounds of potato salad and a few cakes or deserts, she's expected to donate her time and kitchen to provide it. If someone is homeless, just send them to the pastors house, (after all, we pay for it) then "she" can worry about them.

God help her if while doing all this community service and at the same time, raising, caring and home schooling four children of her own, that her house should get a little untidy! She will be the main topic of conversation for at least a couple of months, if she didn't dust the bookcase just right. (after all - "we' pay for it" - right?)

Then there are the women in the congregation who are just a little to friendly and always need to talk to the pastor, because no one else can help them. Usually it's a marriage problem or it's a spiritual crisis because their nail polish didn't harden just right that day. The pastors wife is of course expected to "just be quiet" while her husband helps these poor souls.

I've heard from pastors wives who are treated literally like a slave. People have them doing everything from giving them wake up calls, to picking up their children from school, then watching them for hours.
What does God expect from a pastors wife?

He expects absolutely "no more or no less" than he demands from any other lady in the congregation. "GASP!!" Her job is to care for her husband and family and be a helper to her husband. "Period". Sorry folks! She has absolutely "no" obligation to you. (scriptural or otherwise)

She is to care for her family and be submissive to her husband. The main and most important reason she does this, is because it is pleasing to God. When she is pleasing to God, her prayers are heard and answered, and her home and family life will be blissful.

If you are a lady with marriage problems, especially of a sexual nature, talk to your husband! That is what the scriptures tell you to do. (would you like your husband running to some female for sexual advice?) If you have questions about scripture, again, "Talk to Your Husband". If he can not provide the answers that you need, then "he" can go and talk to the pastor. This way is appropriate! The other is Not!

The duty of the pastors wife is to her husband. Your duty is to yours.

This may shock you, but the duty of the pastor himself is to the spiritual well being of himself, his wife and his family first. (you heard me correctly) When the Christian Church was born, there was never appointed a pastor or head person to be in charge of it. It was the elders that people were to look to for spiritual guidance. Christ is the only head of the Church to this day.

So, to appoint a pastor, priest, reverend or any other person that we could call "leader", or set above the rest in any way, is simply a man made thing. (not Christ) If a man can not be the leader of one wife and one family, who would want them to rule an entire congregation?